Blog Post

A CASE FOR SEXUAL ABSTINENCE FOR DATING SINGLES

1. HOW DID SEX COME INTO BEING?

It started with the creation of man

‘’God created man in His own image, in the image of Him created He him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them and God said unto them, be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it’’. Gen 1:27,28.

He goes further to give details of the process that brings man into being. ‘’But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground. And the Lord God formed man out of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living soul’. Genesis 2: 6,7

Man was created but God still had a problem. And the Lord God said, ‘it is not good that the man should be alone: I will make him an help meet for him’ Genesis 2:18. In verse 19 He created all the animals, perhaps Adam could find one that would be perfect for him. ‘And Adam gave names to all………..but for Adam there was not found a help meet for him’ Genesis 2:20.

Then God finished the process. ‘’And God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib which the Lord God had taken from man made He a woman and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh, she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man’’ Genesis 2:21-23. By that pronouncement the institution of marriage was born.

‘’Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh.” Genesis 2: 24. Sex was introduced into the picture. ‘’and they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

Sex was borne out of marriage. God did not intend for sex to be an indulgence. It was serious business for married people.

2 WHEN THE BIBLE SAYS ‘’ONE FLESH’’, WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHAT DOES IT IMPLY?

One flesh is brought home by Paul in 1 Corinthians 6:16, ‘What? Know ye not that he which is joined to a harlot is one body? For two, saith he shall be one flesh.

The Bible compares the relationship a man has with a harlot which is purely sexual to that which a man has with his wife which includes sex but is not based only on sex. One flesh is therefore expressed in sex, but is not limited to sex. Sex is only an expression of a higher thing-their union in marriage.

When a man marries a woman, their union is a spiritual one fashioned after the union of Christ and the Church. However, in the soul realm they are still apart. But as they keep living in the reality of their spiritual union, their souls begin to knit together and their oneness in the spirit begins to manifest in the soul realm. This process is facilitated by the sex act. Sex helps to bring their spiritual union to more reality. They act and think more alike. Whatever they agree on must happen. So ‘one flesh’ means a knitting together of souls that have already been knit together in the spirit by marriage.

3. WHAT ARE THE PERVERSIONS OF ‘ONE FLESH’? WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES?

When sex takes place before the spiritual union of marriage, the souls begin to knit together but there is no spiritual basis for this knitting together. Confusion sets in and where there is confusion there is every evil work. It opens up the individuals to all kinds of negative and wicked spiritual intelligences that now find expression in the lives of the people involved. It is a known fact that sexually promiscuous communities have more cases of violence and death in them. God’s hands are tied because his laws are being violated.

Because sex before or outside of marriage has become the norm, all manner of sexual perversions are now in our world- adultery, masturbation, incest, homosexuality and lesbianism, sex with animals, pornography. It can’t get worse.

1 Corinthians 6: 18 says Flee fornication. Every sin every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication, sinneth against his own body. When you sin against yourself, it is the height of foolishness, because Ephesians 5:29 says, For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth it. Having sex with someone you’re not married to means you afflict yourself. You open up yourself to all manner of pain and evil. You suffer loss in areas of your life that truly matter to you beyond the sex act, both the men and the women. The enemy uses sexual sin to put people in all sorts of chains that transcend generations.

All these perversions have come to be because people reject God’s counsel and so He gives them up to reprobate minds. They have become lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God (2 Timothy 3:4b)

We give ourselves excuses that justify what we’re doing. Once our consciences become seared, that’s it. The enemy has got you.

4. HOW DO I GET OUT?

It will take a concerted walk with God to get out. Galatians 5:16-23 says it all. In verse 24 and 25 says ‘And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

This walk with God is to help you crucify, kill the lust, desire and pleasure you find in the act of sex. It starts with understanding that God truly loves you and that His plans for you are better that the lie you currently live in.

Then you make up your mind to walk with Him out of your mess and into His glory and liberty. Sometimes it will be rough and painful but you will be free at the end of the day. It does not matter if you are a man or woman.

5. HOW DO I AVOID GETTING IN?

1 Thessalonians 5;22 says to abstain from all appearance of evil. It always starts out looking like harmless fun and then before you know it, you’re flat on your back. Friends, TV, books with erotic scenes, magazines that write perpetually about sex, music etc. They all add up to prepare you for the illicit act. Avoid them. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says to flee fornication ie, take off, run for your life. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says you should not allow yourself to be deceived, evil communications corrupts good manners. No matter how honourable your intentions are, but you hang out with people who do not believe the things you do, you will derail. It’s just a matter of time.

6. WHAT HAS ILLICIT OR PREMARITAL SEX GOT TO DO WITH MY DESTINY?

Proverbs 5 says it all. It talks about what happens to the lady as well as the guy. Then it advises him to stay away from her.

For her

  • Her end is bitter as worm wood sharp as a two edged sword
  • Her feet go down to death
  • Her steps take hold on hell
  • Her ways are movable that thou cannot know them

For him

  • Give your honour unto others
  • Give thy years unto the cruel
  • Strangers will be filled with your wealth
  • Thy labours will be in the house of strangers
  • Thy flesh and body are consumed

Several nations, especially in the West, have allowed the sexual promiscuity to rob them of their greatness. Nations where there is discipline have risen up and are taking over the economies of the world.

God has a plan for everyone but sexual promiscuity could derail you completely from the destiny God has planned for you. It only makes sense that you stay away from it.